Lifestyle, Humour, Health & Mindset

Fight Me

Fight Me

My name is Kelley and I’m here to present to you my extremely unpopular opinions.

I want to preface this by saying that this is not an original idea, there are lots of unpopular opinions on the internet, and literally hashtags dedicated to this subject, but these opinions are my own.

I also want to preface this by saying, while I do stand by my opinions, however unpopular they may be, I don’t really want to fight you physically if you disagree. But if you do want to fight, I’ll have you know that I did jujitsu once and I’m pretty good at combat now.

In no particular order:

Brunch.

Everyone is hyped on brunch, but you know what’s better than brunch…eating twice!

I get it, breakfast food is delicious, and getting to eat a big delicious meal of all the best foods is great, but who has time to sit around waiting to eat brunch? For the early risers of the world, waiting around to eat the best meal of the day is agonizing when we could just wake up and go ahead and eat the best meal of the day, and then eat another meal a couple of hours later.

The only time brunch is good is when it’s actually just “second breakfast,” bridging the gap between breakfast and lunch. #teambreakfast

Avocados.

I’m just going to say it, avocados are overrated.

Here are the hard facts: they taste like nothing, they are elitist and overpriced, they are only ripe for about one day a year, they turn brown immediately, and they are shit for the environment.

Avocado’s are high in fat (healthy fat yes), but do you know what else is high in fat but fucking slays avocados? Nuts, nut butter, peanut putter, almond butter, cashew butter. Tell me why I would waste my time (and precious fats) with some worthless flavourless mush when I could eat peanut butter instead? TELL ME WHY!

Are you kidding me with $15 avocado toast? Have you ever tried peanut butter toast? Guess how much peanut butter toast costs…probably $1.99!!! I’d honestly rather eat buttered toast than waste my time with avocado toast.

Haters gonna hate, but avocados are an overrated, overpriced, overhyped food.

U2.

U2 is the absolute worst band of all time.

Ever wonder why a full U2 album was automatically downloaded to every Apple 6 device? It was because Bono was fearful that no one would ever buy or listen to his garbage album! As a gesture of “generosity and promotion” they made a deal with Apple to give it away to Apple users for free.

Ask yourself how stoked you were to discover that album taking up precious space on your phone? The answer is zero percent stoked, followed by a legit sense of frustration that there was seemingly no easy way to delete it.

Nickleback takes a lot of flack for being the worst band of all time, but lets be real, you shamelessly know the lyrics to all of their hits. Stop denying it, Nickleback rules, U2 drools. (OK, Nickleback does not rule at all, but I still rank them above u2).

Black licorice.

Black licorice is bomb and disliking it is clearly an act of racism.

Dear haters, I’m sorry that your pallet is not sophisticated enough to enjoy this delicious geriatric favourite, you are missing out.

Tacos.

Tacobell, Tacotime, Tacofino, La Taquisa, Del Taco, Taco Justice, Taco Del Mar….it’s apparent that people love their tacos. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy a good taco, but let’s call a spade a spade, tacos are an average food choice at best.

Everyone likes taco’s, what’s not to like, but compared to a juicy burger, southern BBQ, pizza, sushi, Indian food, or even a good pancake, they just don’t hold up.

Tacos are the Dennis Rodman of the food world—a lot of attention for a solid sixth man.

Instant coffee.

Instant coffee is an enjoyable and tasty beverage. Fight me.

I love coffee, and I will take an Americano or Espresso over standard drip shit any day of the week. BUT, to all the hipster coffee snobs of the world, I also think instant coffee can be really delicious. In many countries, that shit’s actually a delicacy, sipped only by the elites.

All I’m saying is, don’t knock it until you try it because it’s 100% better than the ashtray that is Tim Hortons.

Raisins.

I have entered countless debates over these little nuggets of gold, but my stance is plain and simple, raisins are the tits.

Raisin bran = delicious. Chocolate covered raisins = also delicious. Cinnamon raisin toast = so yummy.
Oatmeal raisin cookies = amazing. Box of raisins = still yummy. Look a the joy these children are experiencing!

FIGHT ME.

Running.

I’m not sure why it’s so trendy for people to say running sucks? You know who sucks? You, for not liking running.

Running is the most functional activity of all the activities. Tell me the last time you had to lift something really heavy and squat it in real life?

But running…you need that shit all the time! Running from bad guys, running from wild animals, running for the ice cream truck—it’s just a practical skill to have, and a lovely way to increase your cardiovascular health.

Love Actually.

In the spirit of the Holidays, I thought I would throw this on my list.

I. Fucking. Hate. Love. Actually.

Why is this movie everyone’s fave? Is everyone just blinded by Hugh Grant’s charm and accent while failing to acknowledge that the entire movie is basically about infidelity and death.

Maybe I’m hyper sensitive. Yes yes, I’m definitely hyper sensitive. But from the moment I saw Emma Thompson’s poor heart break, I knew this film was not for me. The years may tick by….but I will never forgive you Allen Rickman.

Decorating for Christmas.

My stance on this is simple. Mind yo biznasssss.

If I want to listen to Mariah, Mikey Bubes, and JBiebs in June, that is 100% not your concern.

Fila.

This is hands down the whackest shit I’ve seen. If this is popular, I am happy to be unpopular.

 Fila

 

 

 

 

 

 

Pineapple pizza.

Maybe the greatest debate to ever take the internet—does pineapple belong on pizza?

The answer is yes it absolutely does. Is Hawaiian the ultimate flavour of pizza, no. Does pineapple taste good on pizza, yes.

 

What are your unpopular opinions??



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